I do NOT enjoy CHANGE. I do not always cope with it. Good change, bad change and CHANGE that is created by disappointment is probably the worst kind of change. Just like the weather some change cannot be controlled.

I write this while I’m experiencing CHANGE. This is a different kind of CHANGE. This is the CHANGE I needed to do a long time ago.

As we started 2021 I was hoping that the global pandemic would have left. Nothing was changing. There is no change in our social restrictions. Yet, something was changing inside of me. I was experiencing a different kind of change. A laying down of what I am used to doing. A laying down of what I am good at doing. I have the experience. I have the talent. I have always been the one doing it.

The change that is beckoning me is a scary one. Stepping away. Letting somebody else do it. Knowing that I won’t disappear. I’ll just be stepping into the shadows a bit more so that I can reflect off Gods light.

“Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow.” -Helen Keller

Moving my focus and facing the new position I find myself in is a metamorphosis of the person in me. Yet my roots still dig deep, allowing me to be steadfast even with CHANGE

How did I get here? Through active CHANGE. Every moment was a CHANGE. Every choice I have made brought CHANGE. I will not dawdle over what could have been, what was, without accepting the fact that ONE very important thing happened. CHANGE


The Way I Feel

The way I’ve been feeling is what “they” say I shouldn’t say.

I shouldn’t go by my feelings is what “they” say.

So what may I ask is this that beats at me with a stick?

This sense of isolation that makes me weak?

The way I’m discarded as one who doesn’t “need”

The way I’m feeling is almost like the sun setting on a stormy day. You can’t see the sun setting. You just know it’s the time.

I’m angry and hurt at the way I’m made to feel.

I’m supposed to be the Strong One.

No pain for me. No dismay. No offence. No defence. No hurt and never a gain.

Just needing a friend to whisper “it’s gonna be okay”

Just a word of encouragement saying: “you know what? You’re so right!”

So here I am today with the way I feel. What to do. Who to talk to. Where to go, and what to live for.

There’s no way for me.

Only this way.

The way that I feel.

Hopefully tomorrow I’ll heal. GcM


Where is God?

Right now the world is caught in a severe pandemic. Everyday we look at the statistics and news of people getting sick as well as of people dying. The common expression today is: “the numbers are turning into names”

In all of this we wonder about a few things: 1. How did we get here? 2.How long can this go on? 3.And more often: Where is God?

There’s an old song written by John Newton “Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far, and grace will lead me home.” I recently did some research on this song. When John Newton wrote this promise, he did so out of personal experience. His greatest test came the day he buried his wife, Mary. He’d loved her dearly and prayed his death would precede hers. But his prayer was not answered.

On the day Mary Newton died, John Newton found strength to preach a Sunday sermon. The next day he visited church members, and later he officiated at his wife’s funeral.  He grieved but in his grief he found God’s provision.  He later wrote this: “The Bank of England is too poor to compensate for such a loss as mine.  But the Lord, the all-sufficient God speaks, and it is done.  Let those who know Him, and trust Him, be of good courage.”

My friend, today I would like to encourage you that right now disease, confusion, chaos, and trouble is overwhelming your world.  But they don’t control it!  Grace does.

In 2 Corinthians 12:9 it says: My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 

How do we boast about our weakness? 1. We pray. 2.We seek God and. 3.We don’t stop believing. An old Sunday school song reminds me to “Read your Bible, Pray everyday and you will grow, grow, grow”

Being stuck in a pandemic does not mean we should be stuck. There are things we can do to find God in this time. God is not stuck. His grace is enough to carry you and I through each day.

Let’s not give up. Let’s not lose hope. But hold onto what we believe to be true. That God is everywhere. That He is able. And that He is in control.

Is your situation so bad right now that you are asking where God is? Then be in conversation with other believers. Let NOW be the time you and I find God as we have never found Him before.

As it says in Jeremiah 29:13 “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Let’s not give up until we feel Gods presence in our lives again. God has not left us.


The Mask

There’s much more than a virus out there.

There’s a plague of dis humanity, hopelessness, expressionless, disconnection, isolation, and the plague of fear.

Watching children at play wearing masks is the saddest thing to see. I asked a young child in the mall this morning: “why do you wear a mask?”. He’s reply was simple: “ To protect me from the virus.” This saddens me. Yes, this pandemic is REAL. It’s just a pity that children are losing the FUN out of playing and then their minds are made up for them as to what they should fear.

The plague of fear outweighs our hope if we allow it. Therefore we will outweigh this through Worship. Through faith. Through Hope. Through our expression. With or without masks! We should not lose our desire to be ourselves. There’s an expression that says that the eyes are the window to the soul. This pandemic is HOPEFULLY reaching us to look into each other’s eyes. This will reveal what is really happening to the soul. So t be afraid to make eye contact.



We spend FAR too much time scrolling through other peoples feeds. And these feeds, feed our soul and heart with unworthiness, despondency, depression, lack of living, comparison, compromise, unhealthy perceptions of who we are and who we should be.

The desire to have and be like somebody else’s documented life is severe in many of our young people, women and men. We say: “do YOU” but we try to mirror somebody else’s life. Even when what they post on insta and facebook happened a LONG time ago, or did not happen at all, and is merely a selfie. The challenge that social media brings is to make us feel what we should NOT feel about our lives.

Me in the mirror

Take a breath, it comes from Your lungs. Blink your eyes. They are Yours. Hear your heart beating. Listen to every beat. It is God given. The blessing of social media is that it keeps friendships going. It connects. It affirms. It confirms. Don’t be like me. Don’t be like somebody else. Do YOU. Yes, I said it. Do YOU. You are all you should be right now. AND there is more of you….seek it. Go to your source. YOUR Life. And don’t forget: the greatest gift you have is looking back at you when you look into a mirror. GcM



Psalm 46:10 ‘Be still, and KNOW that I am God.’

In the busyness of life, it’s good to take a moment to see things in perspective.

When I stop. I breathe much better. I imagine that I am running for a while. My breathing gets heavier and more harder. If I stop suddenly, then I need to “catch my breath” At the time it feels as if I’m losing breath. But it’s there. I just need to take one breath at a time. The same is when life hits hard at me. If I let the hardness continue it will consume my mind and my heart. Stopping let’s me FIND my heartbeat and my breath.

Stop. Revive. Survive

Melina Marchetta

Being still can be challenging. We become so used to being busy. Occupied. Unavailable. Focused on the task. A fixed intention. A permanent action. But all these can be become null and void when we STOP. Just breath. Just feel. Just be still.

Have you ever looked at the rain? It’s difficult to follow a raindrop. As it falls it’s as if it disappears and another drop takes it’s place. if you look hard and long enough one drop becomes many. But with the many drops so much result is achieved.

I encourage you as I encourage myself today. To stop. To be still. To know that there is something greater than what you or I are experiencing or going through. That God is the ONLY one who can stop the rain. He is also the only one who can bring us stillness. But He needs to know that we want it. To be still. To know.

This stillness will bring a new way of looking, understanding and behaviour. It makes me even look at rain with a new perspective. So today: STOP. LOOK. AND KNOW. He is our God.


From Process to Purpose

For every process there is an ingredient. Imagine a recipe for baking or cooking. Every recipe requires ingredients. Without ingredients there is no recipe.

Process can be a tiring, challenging or even rewarding thing in any situation. It is not easy to allow processes. Yet, when we do allow and persevere then the process is forgotten as soon as the purpose is revealed. Yes, we need to remember that process often times reveal a purpose.

Hebrews 10:36 in NLT tells us to PERSEVERE in the process.

“Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God’s will. Then you will receive all that He has promised”

What is the process you’re going through right now? Are you allowing it or are you fighting against it?

When we look at the process or things that we experience in our lives, we have to be careful NOT TO GIVE UP DURING THE PROCESS. I know that this sounds easy, but I want to encourage you today to PERSEVERE!

God sees your process, but He also sees your reaction to it. And He knows the result. Why? Because His promise remains!

Lets talk about bad situations that you and I might face on a daily basis. These situations don’t encourage us. They try to make us feel like failures, give up or even get angry at God. We all have questions. Its not wrong to question WHY things happen. It is wrong to give up, get angry or to refuse the process.

Discovering our own purpose is an experience that becomes more evident with each step of faith and obedience.

This means we MUST be willing to go through the process.

Every ingredient in the process is needed for the purpose.

In 1 Samuel 17 we hear of David finding stones. He did not know the purpose of the stones killing the giant. Only when he saw the giant did he know the purpose.

The giant came dressed in full armour with a sword and shield. David came with a sling and 5 stones. The giant became offended! It wasn’t fair! The fight wasn’t fair!

But David held on. Why? Because he remembered that before this day he had killed lions and bears from killing the sheep he was watching. He remembered his life’s processes. Sometimes we forget that the enemy is intimidated by what we come to him with. We assume it’s the other way around. But He is intimidated by what we have in our hands for the fight. Greater things will be revealed through the process. Gods purpose will be revealed.

The woman and the jar of perfume only realised the purpose of the oil when She saw Jesus

Luke 7:37-38

“A woman in that town who lived a sinful life learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, so she came there with an alabaster jar of perfume. As she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them. Even though those in the place were offended and disgusted by what she had done, In Verse 50 Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”

Her faith to trust in the process brought her salvation and a purpose.

Don’t waste the process. Let it be used for Gods purpose.

Some of us are going through a situation in our lives that we don’t understand WHY it’s happening.

Some situations are done to us.

Some situations we have created ourselves. And some situations just happen. Like a pandemic

This is my advice to us today. Find your main ingredient. Go to that. Ok here it is.

Find God! Find Him. Make sure that He is in the process with you. When you seek him you will find him to be the main Ingredient and the ingredient that will take you to the purpose

Don’t get up ANGRY in the middle of the process. Get up to find your purpose.

Let it take you to the Purpose.

Hebrews 12:2 says: looking unto Jesus the author and the finisher of our faith.

(NLT says: “the champion who initiates and perfects our faith).

How is the Purpose for the process that we are going through revealed?

1. We must get up! It’s not the easiest thing to do but we have to get up.

2. We have to be willing to find it

3. We have to know the main ingredient. What is the one thing that gives us hope and what is the one thing that will make the process get to its purpose.

4. We have to recognise the result and the purpose for what it is. Sometimes we have to recognise it for who it is. God uses people too to fulfil His purpose.

5. When we find the Godly purpose we must not lose it.

Joshua 1:9

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.

Be encouraged God is with you. If we allow Him, then God is in every process in order to fulfill His purpose.

I HATE what is happening to us right now. This pandemic will strip us of our purpose if we allow it. Right now some of us are losing our way through this lockdown or pandemic. We are LOOKING for a purpose to get up everyday. I encourage you to Rise up and return to God.


Each day is an opportunity to get 1% better. Consistently taking small steps in the right direction leads to big results over time. Trust the process.

Things might look bad now but there is always a better plan!

1 Peter 2:9

9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.

Jeremiah 32:19

19 great are your purposes and mighty are your deeds. Your eyes are open to the ways of all mankind; you reward each person according to their conduct and as their deeds deserve.

Psalm 46:10 says: Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted in the earth.

If you would like the opportunity to receive God in your life, then pray with me.

“Lord Jesus, I give you my life and my heart. I give you every situation in my life.

Every process that I am going through right now. Lord I realize that I need you. I cannot live this life without you. Please help me to trust you. Thank you for loving me and for showing me that life in you is not in vain. I surrender.

Lets thank the Lord for His faithfulness and for His grace in our lives.

Lord, we thank you that You are in control. We give you every situation in our lives and we surrender so that You can fulfill Your purpose in our lives. May we know that you are always with us. We pray for your continued grace, Hope and your peace in our lives. Amen.


“‘I saw the Lord always before me, for he is at my right hand that I may not be shaken’” (Acts 2:25).

It’s been a while and SO much has happened! 2nd January Covid positive. Mood negative. Time…it has gone.

While going through the waves and torrents of covid including mental, physical and even Spiritual battle, I felt on the 19th of the 21 days in bed the words of Jesus being whispered in my ears to say to me: Daughter, I pour my light into you. I guide you and do not leave you. I have good plans for your life. I love when you step toward Me to realize them.

I was in NO way able to step anywhere. In my min and heart and not in my physical body. It took me 5 minutes (FIVE PRECIOUS MINUTES) to get UP and go to the bathroom.

But ONE day I stepped OUT of my room and walked. Into the safest place for me that moment. 3 adults. All loving me. All believing that I will be better.

Whenever it feels as if TIME has not found me I begin to search for it in my memory. The memories of physical fatigue and pain can be ruthless when the mind is filled with mental PAUSE OF TIME. The anguish, anxiety of yesterday’s memory can be fatal to the body if I allow it to settle in. Often the exercise of GETTING UP allows me (Yes ME) the person inside of me to escape that.

Finding the person or people who are FOR you, beside you, behind you will allow you to see them and their own longings for time with you.

Time…….I will no longer spend it feebly. I will use it to CHANGE ME. So that others see me and the possibility of TIME…

Why should I?

Listening to the rain falling outside my window and seeing the drops on my window pane I realize with certainty again that something controls this feature. There’s no doubt that these drops are not just arriving

Whether on a cold or a muggy day like today, the same drops are falling. Yet the question remains. How on this earth does this happen? Raindrops falling? Have you ever wondered? Wondered how this happens?

Let me introduce you to this FACT. No science, no man. Just GOD. The creator of the universe has designed every piece of evidence that RAIN is needed. Yet, rain can be damaging. Look at KZN in SA, Hurricanes, Tsunami, Storms, and damaging weather. Does this God control it? Why, when sometimes it takes lives, destroys homes and landscape.

Who called it RAIN? Did He? Did God? Well in Genesis in the Bible it clearly says he designed it.

“Do any of the worthless idols of the nations bring rain? Do the skies themselves send down showers? No, it is you, Lord our God. Therefore our hope is in you, for you are the one who does all this.”
‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭14:22‬ ‭NIV‬‬

What is Sacred is what is with me.

My heart was pounding with anxiety with the dread of not knowing what was going to happen next. I’m just trying to fix it. I’m just trying to make it work. In a flash I realise that I had failed. Nothing was fixed. It was not working. I step back. I close my eyes and focus inside my heart and head. Light seemed to come from somewhere. Deep within.

The word I was hearing was: NO. No? Why No? Surely if I just kept on it would work? But loud and clear was that word again. NO! It was screaming inside of me. Pushing me away from what I was trying SO hard fix.

But what if it breaks? What if it breaks so badly that it is not useable ever again? The voice inside my head adds onto that scream inside of me and calmly says: move away. Don’t touch it. It is no longer yours to fix. Let go. I AM the fixer. But now I have to leave it broken in order that it would WANT to be fixed.

I cannot force it. Relationships have to be bi-directional. This relationship has to WANT to be fixed. So walk away, I must. Until it is ready to be fixed. As I turn around I see what is sacred in my life. The reflection of ME in the mirror on the wall and the sound of laughter coming from the other room. The sounds of joy coming from a deep voice of a 54 years old, a 22 year old and a sweet 16 year old.

These are the days of my life. THIS is what is sacred. Only this. I close the door behind me and join these 3 voices in the other room. GcM

Your Father

A.W. Tozer said “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.” Pain and disappointment have a way of distorting in our minds what is true about Heavenly Father. When life gets hard, the temptation is to believe that God is uninterested and uninvolved. Yet, He is near and He cares. Regardless of what your current or past circumstances try to tell you, take a moment to meditate on this portrait of your Heavenly Father.

Your Father is perfectly faithful.

Deuteronomy 31:8 The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.

Your Father is a generous provider.

Matthew 7:11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him!

Your Father is loving and compassionate.

John 17:23 (Jesus speaking to His Father) “You have loved them even as you have loved me.”

Psalm 103:13 As a father has compassion on His children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him.

Your Father is forgiving and accepting.

Psalm 103:12 As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.

Your Father is a patient teacher.

Isaiah 30:20-21 Your eyes will behold your Teacher. Your ears will hear a word behind you, “This is the way, walk in it,” whenever you turn to the right or to the left. (NASB)

Your Father is an understanding counselor.

Isaiah 9:6 He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Your Father is a wise communicator.

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

James 3:17 The wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

Your Father gives good gifts.

James 1:17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

Your Father is attentive to your needs.

Matthew 6:26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?

Your Father is strong yet personal.

Isaiah 40:26 He who brings out the starry host one by one and calls forth each of them by name. Because of His great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing

Matthew 10:30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.

And so much more. He is more wonderful than our mind can comprehend. He is there, even if we feel that He has left or that He ought to leave, and even when we turn our backs on Him. Our Father is love, pure love, and He does not change.

By Sylvia and Elizabeth Gunter
Used by permission. From: “Safe In The Father’s Heart”


What is my happiness dependant on? How is it valuable or measured? Is what I have for happiness ENOUGH?

I am sitting in my favourite “hiding” spot watching the ocean. I jump with excitement as I see seals and dolphins playing in the water. Are they supposed to play together? It seems to me that they are happy. Yet I soon realise that where they are there could be sharks too! Strange….

Strange how we just cannot all play together in happiness without being on our guard for “sharks” Life always seems to alert us to some danger just in case we get TOO HAPPY.

At one of the other tables a very well dressed woman around my age is also sitting gazing out at the water. She doesn’t seem to be seeing what I’m seeing. That nature is showing and whoever her god is, but My Almighty God is showing me that happiness CAN be found. Sitting there clutching matching Louis Vuitton purse, handbag and even cellphone cover, I see that she’s just staring. Not looking. Not seeing happiness. She’s either sad or lonely.

This makes ME sad. Is happiness what we have in material things? Is happiness what we perceive? Is happiness what we experience? Would we know what happiness is when it happens?

The area that I’m sitting at sipping my drink had many different aspects of a place one could easily get lost in or swallowed up in the loud laughter & chatter of other patrons as well as the sounds of the waves crashing against the rocks.

Yet happiness is evident. In all that. It is there. It can be found. It depends on how and where I look and what I clutch onto. Happiness can be shared. Whether you have more fins than I have or your mouth is shaped differently than mine. or even if your squeal of happiness outshines mine. We can still share happiness.

Letting Go

Hi there everyone. So good to join you today! It’s been a while since we’ve chatted. So much has happened in the past 18 months. There have been good and bad things happening. Unfortunately the bad things happening are trying to overshadow the good things that are happening. Yes it’s a time of Good and Bad. During this time of pandemic, war, death, anger and chaos I am seeing that God is still working.

Right now so many are hurting, dying and so many are discouraged. If we are honest we can say that we’ve all experienced some form of hurt in our lives. When you are deeply hurt by people you least expect, or when you are faced with enormous challenges.

Of course, there is no better way to display your emotions than being angry.But you need to stay calm.Why?Because extreme anger may lead to sin. The prophet Isaiah says in Isaiah 43:18 I’m reading from the NLT translation. 

“But forget all that— it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.”‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭43:18-19‬ ‭NLT‬‬The NIV translation describes it as “Forget The Former Things”

Today I would like to chat to us about “Letting Go”
Just imagine all we did was live in the past? That there was no present and no future. Would you and I learn from the past or would we be stuck in the present that constantly reminds us of the past. The past can never be cancelled or omitted from our lives. But the past can almost be erased! In order for us to “move on” we have to leave the past behind us. But I also believe that looking back to see how far we’ve come is powerful.

We are in the process of moving house right now after 20 years of living in this current house. 20 years of gathering memories! 20 years of memories that hurt when it hurt and 29 years of joy when it was a time if joy. What memories I am experiencing at the moment! Yet, the biggest lesson I am learning right now is “Letting go”

I recently had all my old VHS and video tapes converted to digital Harddrive. I have been enjoying watching “old” footage of when the children were SO SMALL, Clive and my wedding day, and ministry footage of when we first started pioneering the church we are at 21 years ago! Memories. 

I suppose you’ll say that the past is the past. Like Isaiah says that God is doing a new thing. After watching some old footage now digitised I discovered HOW MUCH of our “old” memories have been the foundation for our current circumstances. 

From this I detect that Gods NEW THING is often derived by where we were in the past. Take my life for instance. Growing up in a poor part of Cape Town, where drunkenness, unemployment and so many bad things were happening. There were gangs, insecurity, crime lawlessness. Yet in all of that God was going to use it. I am privileged now to do ministry in a very similar area in Cape Town. Could God use my memories and my past? Yes he can. And He gets the praise for it! 

I am SO grateful that God did not let me go. Nor did I let go of God. 

“Letting go” can be extremely challenging. In moving it’s a matter of asking whether you’ll need the item in the new house or giving it away to somebody. Our “OLD” is somebody else’s “New”Letting go of hurt and anger, disappointment and resentment brings us to a new place. Memories that are hurtful can be causing you and I to remain stuck in our own feelings of despair. Forgiveness brings Freedom. It’s easy to say “we move on” when we are still lugging the memories around with us. In the past 3 months I’ve had to learn to throw away in the rubbish those physical things in my memory that still hurt. 

I have learnt so many lessons from the way my heart has been dealing with packing up. Letting go……and maybe in the process I am “letting God”. 

The words of Jesus in the book of Matthew tells us:“If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.”‭‭Matthew‬ ‭6:14-15‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I want to encourage you today to stand in front of your life and search for the things that still hurt your heart. Let God remove the hurt. Every box I’m packing right now I am making sure that I am not taking “old” with me. Not old in value. But “old” for the forgiven, restored and new me. God wants to constantly wash and clean us. He is truly preparing His Bride for His 2nd coming. Are you allowing Him to change you? I encourage you today to look for Him and I can guarantee that when you seek Him with your whole heart you will find the person YOU changed in His presence.

Let’s pray together. Lord, I realise how much of me is still needing to be healed by You. I give you my heart Lord. Cleanse my heart from unnecessary and old hurt. Give me a new heart of hope and trust. Thank You for taking my hurt and my sin. Help me to forgive those who have hurt me. Set me free to worship You fully. I surrender. Amen
Thank you for joining me today. Don’t forget to LIKE, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE to my channel below. Until we see each other next time. God be with you.